Most fish live underwater, which is a terrible place to have sex because
virtually anywhere you lie down there will be stinging crabs and large
quantities of little fish staring at you with buggy little eyes. So
generally when two fish want to have sex, they swim around and around for
hours, looking for someplace to go, until finally the female gets really
tired and has a terrible headache, and she just dumps her eggs right on the
sand and swims away. Then the male, driven by some timeless, noble instinct
for survival, eats the eggs. So the truth is that fish don't reproduce at
all, but there are so many of them that it doesn't make any difference.
- -- Dave Barry, "Sex and the Single Amoeba: What Every
Teen Should Know"