Random Quote #55 topic: privates, No, not promoted recruits. The naughty bits, that people aren't supposed to talk about. Body parts and functions. (Note that "size" has nothing to do with sex, so size jokes are all in here).
 PROXY  WHOIS  RQUOTE  TEXTS  SOFT  FOREX  BBOARD


A group of soldiers being prepared for a practice landing on a tropical
island were warned of the one danger the island held, a poisonous snake that
could be readily identified by its alternating orange and black bands. They
were instructed, should they find one of these snakes, to grab the tail end of
the snake with one hand and slide the other hand up the body of the snake to
the snake's head. Then, forcefully, bend the thumb above the snake's head
downward to break the snake's spine. All went well for the landing, the
charge up the beach, and the move into the jungle. At one foxhole site, two
men were starting to dig and wondering what had happened to their partner.
Suddenly he staggered out of the underbrush, uniform in shreds, covered with
blood. He collapsed to the ground. His buddies were so shocked they could
only blurt out, "What happened?"
"I ran from the beachhead to the edge of the jungle, and, as I hit the
ground, I saw an orange and black striped snake right in front of me. I
grabbed its tail end with my left hand. I placed my right hand above my left
hand. I held firmly with my left hand and slid my right hand up the body of
the snake. When I reached the head of the snake I flicked my right thumb down
to break the snake's spine... did you ever goose a tiger?"



RSS 2.0 GIVE ME MORE RANDOM QUOTE ANY, FROM privates!

Select Next Random Quote Topic:
  apocrypha bible-old bible-new confucius hebraic koran lao-tse nietzsche wittgenstein english-esperanto handy-poetical vulgar-tongue voltaire-dict foolish-dict zola-dictionary rubai-khayyam art ascii-art astrology atheism bierce-devil black-humor bofh-excuses buffy calvin chalkboard computers cookie debian definitions disclaimer drugs education ethnic evilplan fgump food fortunes friends futurama goedel haywards-definitions hitchhiker hphobia humorists humorix-misc humorix-stories joel-on-software kernelcookies kernelnewbies kids knghtbrd law lehenbauer limerick linux linuxcookie literature love magic medicine men-women misandry miscellaneous misogyny news osfortune osho paradoxum people perl pets platitudes politics privates prog-style quotes-20010929 racism religion riddles rj science sex shlomif smac songs-poems sports startrek starwars subversion tao translate-me vulgarity wisdom work xfiles xian-koans zippy ads-1 answers-1 bulletins-1 complaints-1 cruise-1 danquayle-1 employees-1 eugeneormandy-1 excuses-1 famous-1 forest-1 fortunes-1 insurance-1 kidlove-1 kidquotes-1 kidscience-1 language-1 libraries-1 murraywalker-1 news-1 patients-1 predictions-1 ranger-1 restaurants-1 resume-1 river-1 samuelgoldwyn-1 spoonerisms-1 tourism-1 warnings-1 words-1 yogiberra-1 bushism bushjoke reagan obama junauza liz-taylor

There is a simple script that displays a random message from a database of quotes (as in well-know fortunes game). This version is bundled with quotations from The Bible, The Talmud, The Koran, poetry, prose, famous people and books, humorous items.

generated in 0.00747 seconds