"I do understand what love is, and that is one of the reasons I can never
again be a Christian. Love is not self denial. Love is not blood and
suffering. Love is not murdering your son to appease your own vanity.
Love is not hatred or wrath, consigning billions of people to eternal
torture because they have offended your ego or disobeyed your rules.
Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love
that iscontingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is
respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a
healthy, unafraid human being."
[Dan Barker, "Losing Faith in Faith"]